Tuesday, March 26, 2013

For the girls with messy hair and thirsty hearts...

In a few days, we will be saying good-bye to March
- it's crazy how fast time flies -

Before we know it, it will be summer again
and we will be bitching (excuse my french!)
about how hot it is!!!
when now we can't stop bitching
 (excuse my french again!)
about how cold it is!!!

But that's human nature.

Anyhoo,
I didn't want to leave the month
without a final contribution to Women's History Month
and without thanking all my female friends and colleagues
for who they are
and for the unique support, insight, understanding,
laughter, care and love
that I get from them.  

It's a treat and at times, a life-saver. 

I was lucky enough to get a lot of that this month
both from home and abroad.
So, to all of you: THANK YOU!


Now,
 look at the camera and smile


Flash!

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

uy, uy, uy

I am being such a bad blogger...
and the worst part of it is that it's a trend.  

I get into it and then I can go weeks without 
even saying hello!

Hi! 

I have so many tales to tell.
But today's post is a compilation of a few images 
(you know how much I like using images to express myself)
that at first might look random
but as Haruki Murakami (whom I am currently reading) says:
"Even in the smallest events there's no such thing as coincidence."













Don’t Think Twice, It’s Alright (Live At The Gaslight, 1962) || Bob Dylan


Friday, March 8, 2013

Three Generations

Over the years, I've come to embrace and appreciate the importance of today
 - International Women's Day - 

The day is loaded with different meanings
and as you know I usually take a strong stand on the issue.

This year,
when I think and hear of Women's Day
what resonates the most
is this image.

I introduce you to the Founding Women of my life.
Three generations of them.

I have no doubt that I am who I am because of them.

I respect and owe each of them deeply
and will always be thankful to them.


On the front, from left to right
my sister and my mom
On the back, from left to right
my great aunt's best friend, my gorgeous grandma, me, and my great aunt.

It's pretty amazing that everyone with our own personal expressions, 
a product of our experiences and specific time in life,
is looking at the camera.

It was taken in the summer of 1983, I suspect.

The message that I would like to pass on for this year's Women's Day
is encapsulated in this image.

As cliche as it might sound,
an image is worth a thousand words 
and its meaning resides in the eye of the beholder
so I will leave it there,
for you to enjoy
and take what makes most sense to you.


To all women in my life and to those whom I might not know but
are reading this post
Happy Women's Day.

Feel proud of who you are.
Live fiercely and love passionately.

I will close with a quote
that resonates with part of the message that I tried
to convey today:

"Don't ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance, 
or my kindness for weakness"

Love, 

Sil

Monday, March 4, 2013

Celebrating

March is Women's History Month. 
At least in the US
so over the next 26 days, 
I will make sure that all my entries 
are related to the topic.

I will start the trend, as I usually do,
on a personal note.

Below is my first personal essay
on the matter.

It's being edited as we speak,
so what I share it's probably quite raw
but this is my own platform, 
so I don't mind not waiting for the final version
and showing it as I first wrote it.

***

I AM A WOMAN, SO WHAT?

Right, so I am a woman.  Actually, we aren’t that unusual.  We make up a little over half of the world's population and yet for some weird reason, we still need to prove that we are worthy.  Isn’t that absurd? 

I personally think it is, and not just absurd, but exhausting and painful and draining and the list can go on and on and on.  Believe it or not, I only came to this realization 5 years ago when all of a sudden, the dots began to connect and I could see the picture that they were forming. 

I guess everything began the moment that my parents conceived me and I was a XX chromosome.  That day, I became the first daughter, the first granddaughter, and the first niece of a loving family from the north of Spain.  From that day on, I checked most boxes -- I went to an all-girls school, loved being dressed up in princess costumes, took care of real-looking baby dolls and wore grandma knitted purses.  There were also a few unchecked boxes -- I played soccer with dad in our long corridor at home and I was one of the youngest female members of my hometown soccer team but again, those were just a few unchecked boxes. 

Very soon, I got to understand that most of the affectional support came from mom, grandma and aunties and most of the practical support from dad, grandpa and uncles.  This was one of the most “helpful” realizations, since I quickly learned to adjust my behavior to my need and to the type of human I was dealing with.  I also came to realize that duties were divided and that in most cases, mom, grandma and aunties shared the same responsibilities and that dad, grandpa and uncles shared others.  Then, I realized that what was happening in my microcosm, was also happening at my friends’ houses, at school, at the stores, everywhere I went.  It was so predictable.  We were like robots and I was one of them in the making.

Suddenly, one Sunday, during one of our typical lunches at my grandparents’ house, something sparked.  Gathered around a big family table, there were three generations enjoying grandma’s cooking and each other company.   There was grandma, grandpa, three of my uncles and aunties, mom, dad and my four eldest cousins (at that time, I was still the first and only daughter, granddaughter and nice).   We were all eating, laughing and interrupting each other while talking when suddenly my grandma stood up and said:  “Silvia, my love, help me clear the plates, so that I can bring the dessert.”  I am pretty sure that everyone kept going with their usual business – why wouldn’t they? Grandma was just fulfilling her robotic duty of clearing the table to make sure that the rest of us could eat dessert.  Nothing shocking for the rest but it was for me.  Grandma, my intelligent and loving grandma, had asked me to stand up and help, even though I was still chewing my food and had 1/3 of my meal on the plate.  I looked around and my cousins were all done and playing with the bread, so timidly, I suggested that one of them helped her.  To my astonishment, grandma said: NO.  I quickly swallow what I could and went to help my sweet and robotic grandma. 

Clearly, that day, I was too young to make a sociological study of the situation but I wasn’t too young to feel unfairly treated.   25 years later, at a therapy session in Manhattan, I realized that that Sunday was the trigger that made me embark in the life that I have embarked.  When I turned 18, I left my loving microcosm to venture and discover myself and the world, only to realize that my microcosm and that Sunday lunch was repeated everywhere I went; that the world is in fact a robotic structured system that treats women unfairly.

And the fact is that we women make up a little over half of the world's population, but yet we account for over 60% of the world’s hungry[1]; that we women perform 66% of the world’s work but still earn 10% of the income and own 1% of the property[2]; and that up to 70% of us women experience violence in our lifetime.[3] So I wonder…until when?





[2] http://community.feministing.com/2011/06/24/invisible-women-where-is-half-the-worlds-population/
[3] http://www.un.org/en/events/endviolenceday/pdf/UNiTE_TheSituation_EN.pdf